The World's Dumbest People Jokes

Dumb Criminals Jokes

Wrong Bank

A man went into a Wells Fargo bank and planned to rob it. He got a deposit slip and wrote on it: "This iz a stikup. Put all the munny in this bag." Then he stood in line. But he got nervous thinking that someone might have seen him write the note. So he left the bank and crossed the street to the Bank of America. He waited in line, then handed the note to the teller. After reading the note, the teller determined that the man was not very bright. So he told him he could not accept the stickup note because it was written on a Wells Fargo deposit slip. He would either have to fill out a Bank of America deposit slip or go back to the Wells Fargo. Looking somewhat defeated, the man said, "OK," and returned to the Wells Fargo where he was arrested while standing in line.

What Was He Thinking?

A guy walked up to the teller and handed him a note demanding money. Only problem was that he wrote the note on a deposit slip from his wife's bank account

Underage Drinking

A man walked into a convenience store with a gun and demanded that the cashier put all the money from the register into a bag. The teller did. Then the man saw a bottle of Scotch behind the counter and told the cashier to give it to him. The cashier refused and said she did not believe he was over 21. The man insisted that he was. The cashier held her ground. Finally, the man took out his driver's license and showed it to her. The cashier looked it over carefully and sure enough, he was over 21. She gave him the Scotch and the man left. Two hours later he was arrested after she called the police with his name and address.

Joy Ride

Some employees of an airplane manufacturing company decided to have some fun. They stole a life raft from the plane they were working on. They successfully got it out and took it home without getting caught. Later they took it for a ride down the river. But soon they saw a Coast Guard helicopter coming toward them. It turns out that the helicopter was homing in on the emergency locator beacon that had activated when they inflated the raft.

Robbing a Liquor Store

A man decided to steal some beer from a liquor store. He got a cinder block, went to the store, lifted the cinder block over his head and threw it at the window. The cinder block bounced back at him, hit him in the head and knocked him unconscious. The window was made of Plexi Glass. The whole thing was caught on video tape.

Speeding Ticket

A driver was speeding and was unknowingly caught in a speed trap that measured his speed with radar and photographed his car. In the mail, he later received a ticket for $100, along with a photograph of his car. He sent the ticket back with a photograph of a $100 bill. He then received a letter from the police department with a photograph of hand cuffs. He paid the ticket.

Don't Be Nervous

A nervous pair of robbers entered a record store to rob it. The first one shouted, "Nobody move!" When his partner mover, the startled robber shot him.

This One's Not a Criminal, But Still Pretty Dumb

Too Dumb For Words

A woman called the poison control center, upset because her little daughter had eaten some ants. The person at poison control assured her that ants were not dangerous and that her little girl would be fine. The mother was relieved, then (fortunately) mentioned that she had given her daughter some ant poison to kill the ants. She was told to get to the emergency room as quickly as possible.

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