The ultimate in truly luxurious retirement homesIf everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
Miss Piggy Quotes - Too Funny  :@)
spc Bd 1 Bd 3
 

Princess Cruise Nursing Home

There will be no nursing home in my future...

Beats a Nursing Home!
Princess Cruise Nursing Home

Nope... I'm going to live on a Cruise Ship year round! The average cost for a nursing home is $200 per day. I have checked on reservations, and I can get a long term discount and senior discount price of $135 per day. That leaves $65 a day for:

1. Gratuities which I estimate at only $10 per day.

2. I will have as many meals a day as I want, as long as I can waddle to the restaurant, or I can have room service. The best part is that they're good meals. None of that cardboard stuff I've seen my old friends eating. Breakfast in bed every day of the week, hmmmm.

3. Cruise ships have as many as three or four swimming pools, a workout room, free washers and dryers, a casino, movies and shows every night.

Room service every day
Princess Cruise Nursing Home

4. They often have free toothpaste and razors, and free soap and shampoo.

5. They even treat you like a customer, not a patient. An extra $5 worth of tips should have the entire staff scrambling to help you.

6. I will get to meet new people every 7 or 14 days.

7. TV broken? Light bulb need changing? Need to have the mattress replaced? No Problem! They will fix everything and apologize for the inconvenience.

8. Clean sheets and towels every day, and you don't even have to ask for them.

9. If you fall in the nursing home and break a hip you are on Medicare.

If you fall and break a hip on the cruise ship they will likely upgrade you to a suite for the rest of your life.

And, the best for last!

10. I get to see Alaska, South America, the Panama Canal, Tahiti, Australia, New Zealand, Asia, etc., etc. Don't look for me in a nursing home, just call shore to ship.

P.S. And don't forget, when you die, they just dump you over the side at no charge.

     




Miss Piggy Quotes  :@)
Home Blonde Jokes Men vs Women Jokes Dumbest People Growing Old Jokes Out of the Mouth of Babes Answer This Computer Jokes Engineer Jokes Physics Jokes Flying Jokes Christian Jokes Legal Humor You Live Where? Miscellaneous Jokes One Liners Pet Animal Jokes Police Jokes Puns Work Jokes
Clean Blonde Jokes Jokes for Kids
Fix the Hole Puzzle Jigsaw Photo Puzzles Magic Square Game
Stereogram Pictures 3d Optical Illusions Optical Illusions

Fun
Optical Illusions

We have free optical illusion pictures, illusion art, scary optical illusions, and more.
Get the Explanation
for this
Optical Illusion

Go To Our Site Map Tell A Friend About Us Our Related Links Suggestions and Comments Link To Us
Fast Thinking Game Play Javaroids Free Kid Game Play Black Viper FastLap Dublin Driving Game Play Classic Games Online Classic PC Games
Hard Brain Teasers Free Kid Puzzles Magic Square Game
How To See Stereograms Perspective Optical Illusions Visual Illusions Book
Go To Our Site Map Tell A Friend About Us Our Related Links Suggestions and Comments Link To Us

Other Links


UTF-8 Browser Check US Bank Platinum Travel Card Simple Tetris Satellite Radio Acronyms
Pet Lizards Toy Poodles Car Satellite Radio Fluoride Toxicity
Simple Tetris No Fluoride Toothpaste?
Play Tetris Online Special Characters
Wine Bottle Labels Color Therapy Bath Play Snake Pit Hate Fluoride?
Free Cheetah Race Candle Tips
Greek Alphabet Debt Relief Simple Tetris
Contact Us Tell Us About A Broken Link

Eczema, aka Dermatitis. Causes, Symptoms, Prevention and Cure






Bikes have been around since the 1880s.  Today there are many kinds of bikes, used for work and play.






Cruise deals are not hard to find.  But be sure you know the cruise basics before you embark.
B7
 
JokesClean.com

Site Map | Terms of Use | Privacy & Security | Contact Us | Purchase Agreement | Send Feedback
Humor and Funny Clean Jokes Gallery
© 1996-2005 by JokesClean.com All Rights Reserved.