Joke Bits

Science Experiment

Question:

Upon entering a laboratory, you see an experiment. How do you know which
class it belongs to?

Answer:

If it's green and wiggles, it's biology.

If it stinks, it's chemistry.

If it doesn't work, it's physics.

Rene Descartes sits down for a meal at a Parisian restaurant. The waiter asks for his order and he orders a hamburger.

The waiter asks, "Would you like fries with that?"

Descartes says, "I think not," and instantly disappears.

Ivan Ivanovich, the great Russian scientist decides to do an experiment to know how fast a thermometer falls down. He takes a thermometer and a light, a candle light, to the 3rd floor of a building and recognizes that they are reaching the ground at the same time. Ivan Ivanovich, the great Russian scientist writes in his book: "A thermometer falls with the
speed of light."

Ronald Regan

What is the definition of "electron?"

What the US did in 1980 and 1984 (Ronald Reagan).

A neutron walks into a bar and orders a beer.

"How much for the beer?" the neutron asks the bartender.

"For you?" replies the bartender,"no charge."

What did the nuclear physicist have for lunch?

Fission chips.

What happens when electrons lose their energy?

They get Bohr'ed.

Mad Scientist

A hydrogen atom is walking down the street with a friend when he suddenly stops.

The friend says, "What's wrong?"

The hydrogen atom replys, "I lost my electron!"

The friend says, "Are you sure?"

The hydrogen atom exclaims, "Yes, I'm positive."

The friend laments, "Oh, I thought you were just being negative again."

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